I didn’t see this live, but its amazing.
Cause I knew you were trouble when you walked in
So shame on me now
Flew me to places I’d never been
Now you’re lying in the cold hard ground
Oh my god, I didn’t realize how much I need this. PLL mash up with Twin Peaks theme song. If I had any talent for editing I’d give it a go. Someone out there, hear my fangirl plea.
I Don’t Fail When I Flail - A Fangirl Tribute song. To all the fangirls across the world, may you continue to flail with finesse. All the fandoms!!!
(This is just a little one off imagining the inner workings of one Miss Paige McCuller’s brain. Love, death, the kidnapping and ultimately bliss.)
I love Emily Fields.
Sorry, I just…I mean, here I go, blurting out my undying love for Emily. I kind of have issues with impulse control. I’m working on that. It’s much better than it used to be, now that I let myself actually feel things. If you knew Emily though, you’d love her too. Everyone does. And you know what? She loves me too. The first time she said it to me, I wanted to capture it like a firefly in a glass jar, so I could watch its pulsing glow for just a few more moments, before she released it into the world.
It wasn’t always the smoothest road to love. Timing is a bitch, and there have been some missteps. Mostly mine. I have lost her more than once. When I saw her kiss Lyndon, I thought my heart would cease to beat. I swallowed my rage and pain, and we got past it. Lyndon couldn’t. When Lyndon kidnapped me, I thought “there is a really good chance that I will die tonight.” I won’t lie, I was terrified. I sat there in the closet, my hands and feet bound, my mouth covered. A few things ran through my mind. My parents and the burden of grief my death would bring. I didn’t want their lives to become some sort of stasis of bitter sadness. How I would never again pierce through the cool and placid skin of an empty pool, Mermaid kicking my way down. I wondered if death could be like swimming, that instead of pushing up to the surface, you just took a deep wet breath and surrendered yourself to the blue. Mostly though, I thought about Emily and that she would never know how much I loved her. I tasted blood in my mouth.
I could hear Emily’s voice on the other side of the door, and my throat ached from silent screaming, When I finally saw her, I tried to tell her with my eyes. They said “run”, and she did. She ran and she saved us.
When I told Emily that I loved her, I hadn’t planned it. It just came out. Not like a stumble, but like a song. It felt so good, feels so good, loving her. She didn’t say it back, but I didn’t care. She smiled and pressed her lips to mine and that was enough for me. My heart is always full to the brim now, sloshing around with all this love and the million things I want her to know. I never thought anyone would know me, really know me. Now, I am her open book, words of desire, hope, fear painted across my body for her to read.
She wants to build a life with me, far from the dark clouds of Rosewood. I will make her toast and tea every morning, and kiss the insides of her wrists goodbye when we part. I will love and be loved everyday for the rest of my life with Emily Fields.
I’ve got a brand new song dedicated to all the fangirls out there, and I’ll be filming it this weekend along with a new episode of Girl on Girls on Film - Room in Rome. :) Should have it ready for you on Monday. Have a great weekend all!
I couldn't decide who was gayer in the episode. Paily or Manna?
I know right! I felt like my birthday came early this year. I have to say, in my life I have known many women whose platonic love for other women ran as deeply as romantic love. Love takes many forms, as does intimacy. Do I think there is an attraction per say between Hanna and Mona. Nah. I do think they have a special bond.
Paily was just freaking glorious in that episode. I’ll hold tight to that memory when A gets a hold of them later in the season and I’ll surely be drowning in a puddle of my own tears. Just keep swimming little Paily!